With His hands...

What produces Joy? Just thinking the word and I get a sense of Hope, Calmness, a release of burdens. Why does the word Joy just bring a smile to my face? 

I must admit, coming into this day, even into these moments of time with Jesus, I wasn't really sure what I was looking for. Even after I have read, listened, prayed, and meditated on what Jesus did for me, I sat down to write and wasn't even sure where to start. So I thought about what I had read, listed to, prayed about and meditated on and instantly I felt Joy. But why?

In the past week or so, I have put off doing my quiet time. Allowing other things to "fill" the time, hoping for renewal, and instead feeling more tired than I had when I begun. It amazes me each time I switch my thinking and realize that sitting in front of the tv or reading a "good" book is not refueling. Even though I am sitting there wasting away little physical energy doing such things, my spiritual energy is depleting even faster. When my soul is full with truth, comfort and trust, I feel refueled... I feel Joy. 

As I was listening to the song by JJ Heller called Your Hands, a few lyrics stood out to me.

          

Your Hands- JJ Heller

“When my world is shaking, Heaven stands. When my heart is breaking, I never leave your hands.”

“When you walk upon the Earth, you healed broken, lost and hurt. I know you hate to see me cry, one day you will set all things right, yea one day you will set all things right.”

“Your hands, your hands that shaped that the world, are holding me, hold me still. Your hands that shaped the world, are holding me, hold me still.”

And so I thought about those hands and discovered: With His hands He created the Earth. With His hands, he bore the nails that held Him to the Cross so that He could carry my sins to death. With His hands, he reached out to calm the storm that holds me scared. With those same hands, He Saved Me.

How precious are those hands. Hands that can be stretched out as if to say, “Come to me with your burdens”. Hands that can be put together as if to say, “Pray, in My name, for I came to provide a way for you to have communion with my Father forever”. Hands that can be lifted as if to say, “I will Worship you now and always”.

His hands held out are the what I run to when I feel as I do now that remind me that His hands and His heart are the only things that can refuel me, only things that can bring me Joy.

Jesus, my Savior and my God. I desire to bring you all that is on my mind, all the burdens that I carry and lay them down at your feet. The daily tasks feel overwhelming, certain one’s I desire no more to accomplish. I pray that you would take those away or that you would change my heart and mind. Either way help me to be grateful for the opportunities you grant me to serve You. I ask you to direct my steps so that I am within your will for me each day. I also want to lift up my future to You Jesus. Help me to rest in the fact that You know my future, you have planned my future from before I was even born, from before this Earth was even created. Help me to be grateful for my future, whatever that looks like, knowing that ultimately my path leads to You. What a sweet reminder of just how amazing you are. You have purposes for us to accomplish on this Earth, but nothing is as great as running the race to the finish line. My life is a race, one that is meant to be run with one pace, not speeding and then snail crawling.

And Jesus, I must take a few moments to recognize what today and tomorrow mean. Easter is such a Joy to celebrate because the story didn’t end with your death. The end of the story is life, because you conquered it. Your plan from Creation to now is being accomplished and I praise you for the privilege to share this great news with so many. As we celebrate your risen life, Lord Jesus I pray that many would come to put them trust in You. I pray that your Holy Spirit would be alive in me as well as the other teachers and helpers, preachers and deacons so that many can know you as their Savior and their God. Give us the Joy only you can provide by seeing people’s eyes open for the first time. Help us to be aware of doubts and questions and give us Your words so that only truth is spoken. Remind us that the story doesn’t end with getting saved but rather growing and sharing our Hope and Joy with others as well.

I’m so thankful for what you did on the Cross for me. I’m so thankful that you didn’t stay dead, but that you rose again. Use my hands today and tomorrow to be your servant, to do your will, to fulfill your plans and to accomplish your desires. May you be glorified in all I do.

It is in your precious name that I pray,

Amen

Saturday April 7, 2012
"Fear is just a lie" video journal by Tenth Avenue North for the song "Strong Enough to Save"
"Strong Enough to  Save" song

Sermon "Be Grateful" by Pete Wilson, Cross Point Church
- You can't be grateful for something you feel entitled to.
- We start to focus on the gifts rather than the giver.
- Gratitude is not based on how good your situation is but on how good you SEE your situation to be.
- Has the gift become a burden?

Reading of Jesus last days by Mark (Chapters 11-16)

Lesson Planning for Easter :)

Blog Post...

The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want.

The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not be in want. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he restores my soul. He guides me in paths of righteousness for his name’s sake. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.

You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever.

-Psalm 23

As I sat down this afternoon, I didn’t really have a plan for what to read. I began with Matthew 18, the forgiving King and the unforgiving servant. I then went to Daniel 6, Daniel getting thrown into the den and being rescued by his God. And then somehow I ended up in the Psalms. As I read through Psalm 23, I realized it was everything that I have been wanting. I wanted to know that my God is with me, that He has good things for me, and that he loves me and protects me. He is all that I shall desire, as I do that, everything else is cherry on top of the cake.

And as much as that stuck out to me, it was the first line of the Psalm that really stuck out to me. The Lord is my Shepherd. He’s mine. I have learned so much recently about the relationship that a Shepherd has with their sheep. They call them by name. They guide them to green pastures so that they can eat and be filled. At night, when the sheep are in their dwelling place, the Shepherd sleeps at the door so to protect them from any possible intruders. My Shepherd calls me by name. He knows me. He knows what I desire, what makes me me, more than I do. He puts himself between me and harms way so that I am kept safe. I’m sure there are many times throughout the day where I had no idea that He stepped in and protected me from some worldly danger.

I, at the moment, feel like the dumb sheep. I’ve been led by my Shepherd for awhile now that I forget what it is like to need to look up to find him.. I feel like I can roam amongst the other sheep and attempt to find protection among them. I also need to look up and make sure that I am following my Shepherd and not the rest of the flock. I need my Shepherd. He knows the path that I must take to get the food I need and the safety that I can only find in Him.

Jesus,

Thank you for being my Good Shepherd. Help me to keep my eyes focused on You and where You have me to go. Help me to not rush ahead of you or to one side or another thinking that it may find what I want instead of what You have for me. As I come to you Lord, I pray that you would restore my soul. Renew me Jesus, so that I can serve You in a way that You desire. I thank you for the moments of quiet that You give me. For it is in You that I truly discover who I am and what this life is meant to live for. Help me to seek You more, to seek You at a deeper level and desire to know You better. Fill me Jesus so that I can fulfill the mission that you have called me to do.

Even though I feel as though I am not moving forward with missions, I know that You are working and I rest in that. I must acknowledge my horrible attitude in desiring an answer. You are my Good Shepherd and sometimes, it takes a while before you are able to get your sheep to another green pasture. We are walking Jesus, I beside You, knowing that what is up ahead, in Your timing, is exactly what I need. Help me to rest in that.

I love You Lord Jesus. It’s in Your name I pray these things,

Amen

The cry...my cry

Lord I need you desperately
Lord please take all of me
cause I am crying out can you hear my voice?
I want to stand before
the one that I adore
and I'm crying out Praise your Holy Name
Hallelujah x3 Your holy, so Holy Name

Lord, I need you desperately
Lord please take all of me
cause I am crying out can you hear my voice?
I want to stand before
The one that I adore
and I'm crying out Praise your Holy Name.
Hallelujah x3 Your holy, so Holy Name.

I'm crying out.
I'm crying out.
I'm crying out.
I'm crying out.
I'm crying out.
I'm crying out.
I'm crying out.
I'm crying out.

Lord, I need you desperately.
Lord, please take all of me
cause I am crying out can you hear my voice?
I want to stand before, the one that I adore
and I'm crying out praise your holy name.

I'm crying out.
I'm crying out.
I'm crying out.
I'm crying out.

Without You

Without You- Shane & Shane

I can walk through the storm. I can walk by faith when my sight is gone

Just as long as you are here with me And I can gain everything

But what do I have if I don't have the King. Oh I need to know you're here with me

(Chorus) Here I am calling out Father Can you hear me, can you hear me

I don't want to go without you Here I am can You talk a little louder

So I can hear You, I want to hear You I don't want to move without You

Even though I believe You've taken up a home inside me

And you'll never leave I still need to know You're here with me

(Chorus)

If Your presence goes I don't want to stay If Your presence stays I don't want to goIf Your presence goes I don't want to stay If Your presence stays I don't want to go

I need You

(Chorus) x2

I could not write out my prayer any better than the lyrics to the song above. In many ways I feel as if I am walking blindly and all God is asking me to do is keep hold of His hand and walk by faith. Throughout my quiet time today, I feel like I kept saying over and over to God, “Here I am and I’m ready to listen. Can you hear me? I don’t hear you God, can you talk a little louder so I can hear because I want to hear You…now” And through the words to the lyrics I got a whisper in return, “Danielle, I am God who desires the best for you, and I’m asking you to wait on Me and My timing.” I felt as if I kept telling God: hello, I’m ready to listen, (even though these last few weeks have been quite crazy and I’ve acknowledged you at all the “right times”), I’ve carved out these couple hours in my crazy life and I’m asking that you meet me now. God isn’t asking for a couple hours when I feel ready. I need to make myself uncomfortable, I need to step outside my comfort zone, and meet Him daily.

So, basically, other than the quiet whisper, I didn’t really hear much. I read Deut. 11-13 where Moses is talking to the people before they are to enter into the promise land that, “warning!” false gods are going to appear before you, do not worship them, only Love the LORD your God. I also read through the book of James. A couple versus stuck out to me:

“Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.” –James 1:27

“Now listen, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to this city or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money. Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. Instead, you ought to say, “If it is the Lord’s will, we will live and do this or that.” And it is, you boast and brag. All such boasting is evil. Anyone, then, who knows the good he ought to do and doesn’t do it, sins.” –James 4:13-17

As I begin to seek God out and continue to desire His will, I feel as though I am to wait patiently. I am to be still, and solely rely on the fact that He is God and I am not. I do not decide what tomorrow is going to look like and therefore I cannot decide what going to the mission’s field looks like either. I need to rest in today, in the amazing, overflowing blessings that He is pouring upon me where I am. I must continue to acknowledge that I am desperate for His guidance and will and that without Him each moment, I may drift away.

I love visuals. It something that I can glance at and acknowledge a moment in time where that object was used by God to speak to me or is something that I can remember something that I need to do. This timer represents time running out. The flow is continuous and the amount of sand inside represents how much time is to be observed. As I think about the mission’s field, I needed something to remind me to wait, to be still in the quiet, as if I’m anxiously awaiting the timer to run out, and allow God to work His will in my life. A timer, something in my life that means so much because I am so time oriented. Before I do anything, whether I have 5 minutes or 45 minutes, I always take a moment to gather my thoughts and plan out that length of time. My morning routine is the best example. I sit up in bed and go through the to-do list before I have to get out the door: contacts in, shower/do my hair, get dressed, deodorant, makeup, make coffee, get my breakfast together, have a plan for lunch, make my bed, make sure my house is in order, put on shoes, brush my teeth, put up window shades, turn off the heater, and walk out the door by 7am. Each step is thought out, I know what needs to be done and I can go through the process without really having to stop and think, what next? So as I think about time and how badly I love to plan it out, I was reminded by this timer that I can’t do that for everything. I can do my best to plan out moments, but God’s plans cannot be planned out. I must walk by faith, even if it’s blindly.

Prayer, Praise, Purpose...waiting

Prayer

The last couple of weeks I have to admit, prayer has been overrun by anything and everything  Satan can put in front of me to distract me. I miss it desperately and know that without prayer, I am running the race in my own strength.

Praise

I also miss true praise. Last night, I stood and was surrounded by fellow believers as we sang to the Lord, “How great thou art”. I was overcome with tears as I felt the strength of God rising up in me just by singing His praise. I was reminded how great He is, and how much support I have around me because of Him.

Purpose

What is my purpose in life? When I gave my life to Jesus 7 years ago now, I had no idea just what that meant. But literally, each and every one of us must completely surrender all that we are. After 6 years I finally surrendered, and realized that what God was calling me to do was much greater than anything I could think of myself. Through prayer and praise, I continually ask God to show me His purpose for my life and that I would do so with all that I am.

Update:

Jan 23^rd- I was cleared of all necessary paperwork in order to be put on the list to attend the May 2012 SIMStart (a 4-day training).

Jan 23^rd- I also was sent a link with all the opportunities that are available through SIM. After a few days, I because quickly overwhelmed at the amount of needs that are present.

Jan 26^th- I got a new perspective and some much need help and I once again sat down to go through the options. There I found 5 options that I could possible fulfill.

Jan 27^th- I received the full detailed report and was able to scratch 3 of the 5 off due to different things.

Today: I continue to pray for guidance as to where God wants to me go and what He desires me to do. I sometimes get the feeling that I will be asked to do something outside my comfort zone (as if just going isn’t enough) and I must be in prayer as to where to go.

I’m also very excited with where God has brought me just this far. I know getting all the paperwork in and cleared in the timing that I did is a miracle of His hands. I’m excited that I’m finally at the stage where I can truly begin focusing on where to go and when.

I’m looking forward to continually acknowledging God’s direction with this whole mission. As He continues to weave and create a beautiful basket of all His doings, I desire to allow God to do His will. I’m also looking forward to all the connections He continues to formulate in my life that are added bonuses on this path to the missions field. I also look forward to many times of quiet with my focus on Him and Him alone. (In this I pray against the enemy that God would protect this time and that I would do my part to fulfill what He is asking me to do for Him). And I also look forward to the SIMstart that will take place in May. I’m looking forward to meeting all the wonderful people who have helped me along this journey and encouraged me. I also look forward to meeting other prospective missionaries that are journeying down this same path I am as I realize I am never alone.

As I venture out on this beautiful Saturday morning in January where the weather is to be in the high 70’s, my prayer is that I can listen to God’s voice clearly in all that I do. I pray His presence is near and may all that I do be for His glory. Lord I am waiting on you, patiently I will wait. I will move ahead bold and confident, taking every step in obedience as I continue to serve You, worship You, and I will not fear for you have called me to run this race that is to your glory and honor. What a lovely song that you have spoken to me through and as hard as it is to hear those words, I know that is just what I am suppose to do; wait on you. Jesus thank you for being my Savior, my best friend and my everything. I love you and desire to serve you with all that you have created me to be.

In your sweet name I pray,

Amen

1 year!

Today marks 1 year since I began this blog. Wow has God done same amazing things in my life. As unfamiliar and unknowing many circumstances seem to be, I’m in still in awe daily of what Jesus has done and is doing in my life. I was really encouraged last night as I talked with a good friend of mine and her husband about Missions. I really believe God has laid it upon my heart that when I see the description that He has for me, I will know. And through their own missionary background, that same was true for them. I believe God has a specific plan, place and purpose for me in another part of this world and I must wait on Him to fulfill that.

As I have written over the last year, many times I have mentioned the struggle of wanting to get married. A few days ago I went back and read posts that I had written at the very beginning of this journey. A line that I had written stuck out to me, “Father this is my prayer, for you to break my plans of getting a preschool teaching job, being comfortable with my things and waiting for you to bring me a husband.” As I read that, I cried. He has fulfilled each of these prayers in ways I never thought He would. First, a preschool teaching job was what I thought I would do since before I graduated from college. I got my degree and extra units so that I could do that very thing. And my heart is definitely for preschoolers and helping them not only with their alphabet and counting, but also understanding the Gospel. I love making it real for them so that they can see just how powerful Jesus is, how He is everywhere, and how much He loves them. But God has reaffirmed multiple times that working in Ministry doing what He has for me each day is exactly where He wants me to be. I truly feel at peace with this.

Second, how often in the last year have I looked around my room and realized that all I really need in life is my Bible. Clothes would be helpful for the sake of everyone else around, but truly, all I need is God’s Word. As I get closer and closer to leaving, I realize more and more how the “stuff” in my house is just that, “stuff”.  He really has shown me what is important in life; Loving others. I know that when the time comes, I will walk away with a few clothes, my Bible, and many many memories that will sustain me as I am away.

And thirdly, what I would say would have been the one prayer that there was no way that He could fulfill so quickly. As I have struggled with what seems like everyone else around me dating, getting married, have kids and settling down, I have been on this path to go and preach the gospel in another country, by myself. I have cried many tears over not having a partner in this life to be able to share each and every thing with.  My hearts’ desire is still to get married one day and get the opportunity to have kids of my own. My recently, God has lifted a desire higher than this, and that is going to the Missions field. I believe God has asked me to go alone, knowing that if He does grant me the desire to get married, I most likely would remain here and fulfill it, instead of going and fulfilling His ultimately greater purpose of reaching those far away. And there’s a peace that surpasses all understanding when I think about this. I have laid this prayer at the foot of the Cross so many times, I believe I have released it to His timing.

And so here I usher in a new year with new prayer requests, and I hold a trust in God that He too will fulfill these in his own way. Finances scare me, I don’t like money, and I believe that is one of the many reasons He is sending me overseas. As different things arise and begin to become clear as far as the coming  months go, I tend to see a bigger picture and therefore fall into fear. My prayer is that I would trust God with my finances and that even at moments when all seems impossible, I will remember the verse that I have read many times this past week, “With God, all things are possible”. May this next year be filled with many new adventures, new accomplishments and more souls saved for the Kingdom. May my hands and feet be used by the Holy Spirit to accomplish all that He has for me to do in this next year.  I really am excited for this new year. I’m sure at different times it may be harder than I would have liked, but with my God, I know that He already knows what is to come. May I rest in His unfailing love.

Jesus, I love you. It is all about you Jesus and I’m so sorry Lord for the things I have done. Forgive me and help me to remember that it is all about You. God may I fight each battle as Jehosaphat did by command from You, which is to lift my voice and Worship You.

I love you Lord, and I lift my voice to worship You. Oh my soul, rejoice. Take joy my King, in what You hear. May it be a sweet, sweet sound in Your ear.

A lesson on Waiting

Greatest teachers of Godliness:

#1: Suffering

#2: Waiting

As 2012 has gotten underway, I have been looking forward to nothing more than attending church. I have also noticed that my soul craves for time in the Word more than it has before. Anytime I have free time, I want to read about Jesus, or Paul or a Psalm or some Proverbs. I really am seeing more and more how God is shifting my views of what is really important in life. I have a renewed passion for people coming to know Jesus as their Savior and my heart really grieves for those who do not understand what it means to have a personal relationship with the God of the Bible.

As I was praying this morning, I was reflecting on my spiritual birthday. It is days away where, I believe, I will be 6 years old J. I am so thankful to God for making His Word so real that my heart and soul felt complete the minute I finished praying. I think back on that moment a lot, the faith it took for my friend to step outside his comfort zone and tell me everything he knew about Jesus and the Bible so that I could repent. I’m so excited to get the opportunity to share Jesus’ love with others and even more excited to, God willing, get the opportunity to go across seas and oceans to bring His love to someone who may have never heard of Him.

And here I insert the sermon. It was titled, “Waiting for God’s promises” and preached by Pastor J. I could probably leave it at that and you would understand that I was obvious taught a lot. I really believe one of the hardest temptations we face is immediate gratification. I will speak for myself and say it is really really hard to wait for anything. For example, let’s say I’m shopping at the grocery store. As I go up and down the aisles I’m getting more hungry by the minute. I had planned to make a healthy dinner, some chicken, rice and green beans. However, the lure of a quicker meal arises and a purchase Mexican food on my way home because one: it sounds waaay better and two, I get to eat now. And this is only a small example. As the desire to go to the missions field was began to take surface and an organization was chosen and things started to move along, all of the sudden I wanted to know where I was going and more importantly when, sooner rather than later was my preference. I wanted all the answers. And God is teaching me to wait on His timing. I believe He has promised that I will go oversees at some point. Whether that is sometime this year, next year, 2-3 years from now, I don’t know. And it kills me to wait! At this point I am also waiting to see where I am going. I have been given possibilities, I have responded with questions about them in hopes that the decision will be made sooner rather than later. Once again, I just want to know. I’m waiting for a response to the email, I’m waiting for people to turn in their references, I’m waiting for the invitation to the May training, I’m waiting… and the list continues.

So as Pastor J spoke on Sarai having to wait for her promised son Isaac, I reflect on her timeline. 11 years after the “promise” by God was made, Sarai became impatient and came up with the grand idea that since God had not fulfilled his promise in her timing, she was going to take it upon herself and come up with this (what she thought was) brilliant idea to have her husband sleep with her maidservant to give her a child. Enter Ishmael (Gen 16). (Side note- Gen 16:5, Sarai blames Abraham for coming up with the idea!) It took another 14 years of waiting, a total of 25 years, until God fulfilled His promise to give Sarai and Abraham a son, Isaac (Gen 21). 25 years of waiting! My immediate reaction is, God, please not 25 years. All of the failures that Sarai faced: impatience, insubordination, intolerance and infidelity were ultimately repented of and she was able to conquer the impossibly, improbably, the inadequate, the inconsistency and infidelity of her situation through faith. Pastor J pointed out in his conclusion that suffering is the #1 teacher of Godliness and waiting is #2.

God best is worth waiting for, I do not doubt that ever. My prayer is that when it gets hard, I will remember this sermon, I will remember that God fulfills His promises. I will remember that trying to come up with my own idea to fulfill God’s promise is likely to only cause problems. I will remember that in waiting, I am learning what it means to be like Jesus. I will remember these verses when waiting seems difficult:

Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD. -Psalm 27:14   

LORD, I wait for you; you will answer, Lord my God. -Psalm 38:15

I wait for the LORD, my whole being waits, and in his word I put my hope. -Psalm 130:5

But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.- Romans 8:25

  

Dear Jesus,

I cannot wait to be with You in Heaven. I cannot wait to Worship You with my hands raised all the days of Eternity. Waiting Lord is hard. And with all my heart I believe you understand exactly how I feel. Lord I thank about the time when you were in the garden, down on your knees asking God to take away what was coming if it was His will. You then waited as we nailed you to the cross and your human body began to fail. You then waited 3 days before returning to life and ultimately to Heaven. I believe you understand exactly what it means to wait on our Father, and Jesus I come to you tonight asking You to give me patience. Calm my anxious soul for answers, help me to remember that you are faithful in your timing with all that You have for me. Help me to store up the verses above in my heard and guard them so that I can carry them with me wherever I go. Jesus I love you, I love the moments where I feel your presence and since your direction. Thank you for this life in You. I deserve death, I deserve hell, and yet You died to allow me to be in communion with You always. May you Lord continue to use my hands and my feet as you will, in your perfect timing.

I love you Jesus.

Lyrics from Chris Tomlin’s “Our God is Greater”

Water You turned into wine
Open the eyes of the blind
There’s no one like You
None like You
Into the darkness You shine
Out of the ashes we rise
There’s no one like You
None like You

Our God is greater, our God is stronger
God You are higher than any other
Our God is Healer, awesome in power
Our God, Our God…

And if Our God is for us, then who could ever stop us
And if our God is with us, then what could stand against?
And if Our God is for us, then who could ever stop us
And if our God is with us, then what could stand against?
What can stand against?