The Great Commission

Most of us use "I'm waiting for God to reveal His calling on my life" as a means of avoiding action. Did you hear God calling you to sit in front of the television yesterday? Or to go on your last vacation? Or exercise this morning? Probably not, but you still did it. The point isn't that vacations or exercise are wrong, but that we are quick to rationalize our entertainment and priorities yet are slow to commit to serving God." - Francis Chan, p. 169


Is that true in your life? As I read those words this morning as well as the rest of the paragraphs of the last chapter in "Crazy Love", I was torn. First, I felt as if God was completely speaking to my heart. At least 3 times did Chan use the word missionary just in that chapter. And prayer is important, it is my conversation with God and when it comes to serving to this extent I feel as if it needs a couple extra prayers to make sure I'm hearing right. But affirmation seems to be ringing. And it sounds completely crazy, but I can't just jump on a plane, no I am not that crazy, God knows I'm a planner and therefore I pray for a few more details.


So I'm not just sitting anymore. I'm praying earnestly, but I'm also searching for opportunities, looking to see where God wants to open the door.

Rationalize, prioritize, what is important in my life?
1. God
2. family
3. friends
4. work
I guess I needed to be honest with myself and list them. But I'm not sure that is the right order that I have in my mind at the moment. My prayer is to refocus and re-prioritize so that the list above is what is playing out in my life. But I have to admit today was a tough day. I'm not sure why the emotion, why the frustration, why the heavy burden, but I definitely didn't feel like me today. I attempt to be a happy person, constantly thinking about the life God has blessed me with and challenging myself each day to realize this day God created and has a purpose for me to fullfill today and I must do so with an attitude of Christ. But that just didn't happen. And I'm not sure if I was frusturated with people, the conversations I had with them, or just what is going on inside of me that is just so overwhelming I can't seem to decifer much else. Maybe this moving away for a couple months might help. :)

So it's always on my mind. The weight is constantly on my chest, literally I feel like 10lb of bricks are on me. But if I seek God's attention first, ask Him to guide me each moment, pray for wisdom from the Holy Spirit to guide my actions and words, then everything will fall into place. I no longer belong to myself, I am God's, I am God's tool to use to help accomplish the Great Commission, which funny, is the preface to the verse I have chosen from the very beginning to title this blog.

Father God,

You are a God of love, of gentleness, of self-control. You have created the heavens and the Earth with your hands and those same hands were used to create me. You have pre-destined my life and know the ins and outs of everything I have done, am doing, and will do. You see my life in its entirety and yet You also see me right here, right now, as I struggle to determine what I must do, when I must do it. But I have faith that you will pull through, that today was a day I attempted to do it by myself, I have failed miserable and have come back knowing that only You complete me. For the Holy Spirit dwells inside my heart, helps me to see clearly and guides my path. I give you the struggles, the conversations, the tought situations I faced today and just ask that you would come along side, help me to decifer which of those need follow up and which need to be put behind. The sin of this world has created these situations which are not at all pleasing to you. Holy Spirit I ask for your wisdom that is higher than this world to be able to move past and onto exactly what You have for me.

I love you. I desire to seek you more. It is in these tough days that I realize just how much I need you. May I praise you amongst the feeling of sadness, frusturation and confusion and see your Mighty hand working instead. For it is in these times that You are so alive.

I know I'm called to suffer and to take up my cross, but sometimes I grow so fearful when I count the cost. Still my heart wants to follow and to walk in your ways, to be counted with the faithful, Lord guide me today.

With all my mind, my strength and my soul, I will love you God, so here's my life, and take complete control!

Father break my plans,shape my heart, take my will to where you are. Move my mind through your Word, til all that I am, lives to Love You Lord.

I ask these things in your precious Name,

Amen